Wow! It's been a while since I've blogged. There have been quite a few changes in my life. Well, first, I got engaged a couple of months ago. I'm getting married to a wonderful and Godly man who I just love and am hot for!!!! I know this is only because I fell in love with God and myself first and found my purpose in life. Because I stood on God's principlebs, I attracted a man who believes in what I believed and treats me the way I see myself. We are so excited and blessed. Just wait and see what the Lord is going to do in our relationship and how He's going to use us.

Being engaged or planning for marriage is work, but of course it doesn't compare to the work in marriage. We finished premarital counseling, and it was a special time and intimate time for us. This whole engagement period is a special and intimate time. I don't know how anyone could get married without it or how any so called Christian would go into a marriage without biblical counseling. Planning a wedding is work too, but to be honest, I'm more focused on my future marriage. We just want to be with each other and we rush through wedding planning conversations so we can talk about us and have fun. It's cute. I just love this man, and he loves me.

When I first started blogging, I wrote about being a single Christian woman. I could give advice, because I was single for 26 years. I had experience and knew what I knew to be true. I want the same to be true for marriage. It will be years, like a decade, before I profess to know anything about married life. But when that time comes, I know I'll have much to share and much experience. Who knows how God will use my marriage to teach others. However, I still plan to blog about issues Christian woman face and our walk, and share my personal walk. Stay tuned....
Love you!

Love Is In the Air

Happy Valentine's Day!

Lord, I'm so thankful that you brought me to you. I'm so thankful that you allowed the circumstances for me to fall in love with you, because I know that through your love I saw the kind man and friends I needed in my life. Lord I love you, and you are my love song. Lord I praise you.

Lord, I thank you for the love of my family and friends. I thank you for unconditional love, honesty, and forgiveness. Who will ever love me like you do?

Lord, I praise you for the wonderful man you've sent in my life. You said that if I trusted in you and delighted myself in you, that you would grant the desires of my heart. Lord, I bow down to you, because you've allowed me to be found by a man who loves you in a world that is against your rules. These last seven months have been full of growth and really just practice for what you've called us to do in marriage. We honor you, and we thank you Lord for allowing the cirucmstances for us to meet.

Ladies, people laughed when I described the kind of man that I wanted. They said that he didn't exist, but I knew what God told me. And I knew what I needed. Some said that I should have held on to the man I dated who wasn't good for me, because he was better than having no one at all. If you are in a place where you are being strung along, giving your body to someone who isn't committed to you by law, or are begging for your man to propose, I urge you to leave and get hooked up with God first. That man who is bringing you uneasiness could be blocking you from the true blessing that God has for you. Don't be afraid to let go. I can speak on this because I've been there. I know that letting go isn't always easy, but I can tell you that the reward is GREAT!!!

Love, Be Loved, and Give Love,

Z.

So, I’ve been in a relationship with a wonderful Christian man for about 4 months now. Anything that I ever went through in the past with guys was worth it if it meant that it was preparing me for the man in my life now. I haven’t written on the topic in a while, because it’s taken me a while to process everything. Let’s just say that when God moves, he moves. I’ve said it and heard it over and over again that while statistics say that 75% of African American women will never marry, the Lord grants the desires of 100% of the people who serve and are submitted to Him. He doesn’t lie.

This has truly been an amazing experience. I knew this was a man after God’s heart when:

I never had to ask where is this going, because he knows the exact dates of when we met, when we became exclusive, when he plans to propose, and he even has a financial plan for us in marriage. Ladies, when this is the man God has placed before you it’s not a matter of if we get married, but when we get married. This man brings up most of the conversations about marriage, because he is a planner.

I was to too and not the you, as in he said I love you first.

I don’t open car doors or pull out my own seat in his presence. To be honest, I don’t really lift a finger. He treats me like I’m a rare jewel. As a matter of fact, he calls me that.

He’s seen my weaknesses, heard my cries, and has even been through those irritable times of the month, and he still can’t get enough of me.

He respects my limits and even has his own, so nothing goes past kissing. Ladies, I realized that the guys that in the past couldn’t handle the no sex rule, because they didn’t see themselves marrying me anytime soon. They were probably thinking that they would be dating me 3 to 5 years without sex. Lol. But see this man, knows that within a year and half it will be all his, so he’s not even sweating it. He is a man with a plan.

He knows my thoughts before I say them. When I don’t know what to do about conflicts we may experience, I go to God, and it is so evident that this man is open to God, because it’s as if God tells him the very things I desire.

We started praying together every night after we became serious. He knows my needs. It’s beautiful. We were approaching a period where we wanted to make sure that we should continue dating. We wanted to hear God clearly about one another, so we fasted. We ended up on a completely different level after the fast. We are closer to each other and to God.

My car broke down on a highway and he was right there and even said that if I couldn’t get a car I could use his and he’d find friends to get him around.

I’ve accepted his weaknesses. We communicate well, so there isn’t much conflict. We talk things out and listen to each other.

I’m growing closer to God in this relationship. God is changing and molding me. I continue to die to myself.

His family feels at peace with me, and my family feels at peace with him.

The calling God has placed in my heart to pursue ministry work is louder than ever. The same is true for him. I feel that we are going to be a great force. God is working on us, and I accept the trials that come our way, because I know what the end result will be.

He desires our relationship to be an example to others. I do too. We have similar backgrounds and are striving to be that marriage that our family tree has never seen before.

So many other great things happened in my life as were dating. He didn’t take away from the quality of my life at all.

I feel so covered and safe.

I didn’t feel like I always had to put my best foot forward. I felt so comfortable letting him see all sides of me.

Before all this happened, I had a feeling that a man was coming soon. I just had no clue who this person would be. It was a surprise, and to be honest, I wasn’t really sure what to do about it. I thank the person who told me that I better go out with this man or else I would greatly regret it. Thank you!

Hello,

It's been over a month since my last post. Things have been going very well. I suppose I've been a busy body, so finding time to stop and write something meaningful has been difficult. I am now teaching and in school. It's been a month, and I am still adjusting to everything. There's so much I need to get out of my head and on to this blog about my experiences teaching, my walk, and dating the Christian way, and I promise to do that soon. I love you!!

I would be lying if I told you that your life as a saved person will always be happy. You should always possess joy, but you will experience grief, despair, heartache, and even anger. The truth is that just like the weather, seasons in our lives change. Even Jesus had to go to the garden to be alone. However, shortly after that "season," he resurrected and went from glory to glory. I believe that the key to surviving the dry seasons is knowing that "trouble don't last always," and living as if we are in and envisioning our harvest season. We must not let dry or cold seasons block us from our birthright to be heirs to the throne.

Today, I'm in a good season. The things that I believed for last winter and spring arrived this summer. I survived the rough times by knowing that my dry seasons couldn't and wouldn't last forever, because God had things to do. It was not in His purpose for me to stay in a season of lack.

I am also cognizant of the fact that my good season isn 't going to last forever. It could change tomorrow, so I've got to arm myself with the Word and the Lord's truths to be protected from the drought when it arrives. If you are in a dry season, know that it could change tomorrow! Thank you Lord for all you've done for me. Praise is my weapon. I'll live as if the kingdom depended on me, no matter the season.

This is a Christian blog, so what I am about to say may sound different from what we are used to to hearing on finding, I mean being found by a man, and being in a healthy relationship and marriage. If he is cheating on you or abuses you, then you are not in a healthy relationship. There is no need to make it work if you are not married. The world says that 74% of African American women are single. Single includes women who are dating, but not married. However, the Word says to commit to the Lord in whatever you do, and your plans will succeed (Proverbs 16:3 NIV). It may not happen when or the way we want it to happen, but it will happen when we surrender to Him. I now know that there is a pattern to being found by a man after God’s heart

I fell in love with the Lord and gave Him my everything.

I served others more.

I forgave those who hurt me. God showed me that he wasn't going to bring a good man my way until I proved I could forgive those who hurt me the most, including my father.

I fought to get into my purpose, and took leaps of faith even when it didn't look
like the position was going to come up.

I submitted myself to the authority of Godly women who could provide sound counsel
and show me the ways of the kingdom.

I decided to crucify my my flesh, including the worry, doubt, envy, and fear.

I gave even when I didn't have to give.

I began doing things a woman in a relationship or marriage would have to do, even though I had no one.

I took time to nuture my appearance.

I kept the faith that God would grant all of the desires of my heart.


I will continue to do all of the above things for the rest of my life.
It's only after taking care of these things that the saved man we
hoped for can find us. We would mess it up if he came before then. Ladies, a man who is looking for a wife observes. He watch from afar before he makes his move. We never know who is observing us in hopes of wanting to get to know more about us. What would the men observing us say? I know these things because I've dated in the world and conceded on God's promises. Now I'm in a relationship with someone kingdom minded.

I'm still here. Vacation bible school week, work, socializing, and trying to learn as much as I can from women who are where I want to be has kept me busy. I don't mind being busy. I am open to their advice in career/purpose, love, marriage, and appearance. Ladies,it's ok to try to look attractive. Many of the women in the bible underwent months of beauty treatments before they were presented to their husbands and/or were praised for their beauty. Let's not forget that men are physical. I know a feminist reading this right now wants to talk to me =). If you want a king, you have to be a queen. I received some great make-up advice and with the help of my mentor and a friend added a few items to my wardrobe. There comes a time in all of our lives when we have to step up our game. Life is good. Life is beautiful! There's been some excitement (wink).